Just In Case There's Just One Left
by BeautifulInversion
Summary: Story is a Sexis fic based on a Nickelback song, during the time period in which Alexis is coming to terms with the news of her cancer. A conversation on the docks. Disclaimer: I have no rights to these chars. but I do love them together.


-1He walked up behind her, where she stood looking out on the water the boats clanging against the docks and the wake splashing against the wall in front of her. She was standing on the 2nd step down, the 2nd step on a set of stairs he had found her own once during her pregnancy with Kristina. The conversation they'd had was one of cryptic dialogue that he regretted that it had taken him so long to piece it together. If he ever really did on his own. She heard his footsteps or a set she believed belonging to someone else, his newly reconciled right-hand man.

"Jason, thanks again for your help, but I really don't want to discuss it anymore…either it." Her voice was hollow and Sonny was almost immediately behind her as he said softly.

"Whatever you want, Lex." He saw her jump as his voice betrayed the presence she thought herself to be in. She wrapped the oversized brown sweater she was wearing over her clothes, tighter around her torso, her arms crossed over her chest. As well as he knew his former best friend and he believed he still did…he knew what wearing the sweater on a rather warm day in Port Charles, even next to waterfront truly meant. It was about comfort, something he regretted she never had earlier in her life and something that eluded her even now as an adult. "No need to talk at all." _Sweetheart_, he added to himself.

"How did you find me?" She whispered, not to whisper, but almost as if she just didn't have the energy to speak any louder.

"You left the hospital," he said, ignoring the question.

"Still have your men tailing me? Their only concern should be Kristina," she told him. "Especially now." He didn't quite know what she meant but he didn't like the sound of it.

"I knew you were sick. I know where you go when you're worried…when you're upset." He answered her, brushing the hair from her shoulder so softly it could have been the wind. He surmised that she must have thought it was because she didn't shrink away, and she had every reason to…he had been so awful to her, even before his breakdown. The only things the woman had ever given him had been selfless and positive. She rescued him from jail and from himself, given him a beautiful and intelligent daughter, she'd lost friends for him, risked her life for him, and she'd protected their little girl whether by omission or lie. It really didn't it matter anymore. It never really had…He'd been angrier over losing the friend he had come to love more than anyone, only he couldn't show that…betrayal becoming the guise.

"Jason?" She questioned the source of the information that was leaked, the inquiry ending on a cough, then a few more that seemed to take her breath away.

_Breathe_, he thought to himself, _Oh, God please breathe_.

"Kristina," he said as he wrapped his arms around her waist, placing his chin on her shoulder. He thought she would fight him, but instead she sagged into his chest, never turning around to look him in the face. She was shaking, not crying, not cold…her entire body was trembling. "She said she woke up and went to ask for some water and found you on the couch, coughing. Coughing until you couldn't stop and she didn't know what to do. So she went to the kitchen and climbed up on a chair and took a glass of water to you." His voice so close to her ear from it's position on her shoulder, he barely needed to speak at all. "She crawled up in my lap and put her arms around my neck and asked me in a voice that far outweighed her years, 'Daddy, how come Uncle Ric left Mommy all alone when she was sick?'" Sonny hugged the little girl's mother tighter to him. He felt her reach up and brush a stray tear away. "Where is he Alexis?"

"I'm fine." She said, her voice catching from a tickle in her throat.

"Lex, you're not…"

"Sonny it's just a chest cold. That's it…Sweet though that you kept Kristina. You two should spend more time together." He knew she was trying to provoke him and it wasn't going to happen.

"Alexis," he said slowly and drawn out, in the way that only he could…despite the emotion enveloping her…she shivered slightly a his air from his voice brushed against her ear. "I've known you for a long time, a long time. And I have seen you sick a couple of times, period. But never this sick."

"You haven't even seen me," she said referring to the fact that she hadn't turned to look at him, he'd only heard the cough.

"I don't have to…God, help me but I still know you." He said, repeating a phrase she used toward him, when he was in a rather bad predicament. She smiled. He knew she was smiling, dimples and all. "Tell me what it is Alexis…please, I need to know. IF only so that I can comfort our daughter better…you can TRUST me."

It was only then that she turned, meeting his eyes momentarily before he pulled her head flush against his chest…he could feel his heart beat racing as he anticipated the words that finally came out of her mouth. "It's cancer." She was a little surprised when she felt his own body heaving with hers and reaching a hand up and pressing it to his cheek, she found wetness there. Why after all this time? Why had they let their own hurts get in the way of their friendship to begin with? "Sonny," she managed out sobbing heavier as the confession was weighing on her lips. "She hates me!"

He squeezed her to him, rubbing her back comfortingly. Sonny shook his head. Once again, they were all seeing her wrong…this was Alexis, she should be more mad at her daughter and husband than she had been toward anyone, but she was beating up on herself. "She's outta her mind, Lex. No one loves her more than you've tried to, not even Jason."

"I wanted her to have a mother…a mother that would be good to her and believe in her…SHE HATES ME, Sonny." It was hard to make out the words, but the last sentence came out quite clearly as she gave in to another coughing attack. He held her through it, pressing a kiss on the top of her head. "Someone will see us out here, Sonny." She said out of breath. "I'm the District Attorney…"

"and I'm out of the business…I could care less if someone sees us out here Lex. I'm not leaving you." He told her his hand reaching down to hold hers as they stood there in silence for a few minutes and then he asked again, "Alexis, where's Ric?

"I-I don't know. It hurts too much. I, I don't want the girls to know I'm upset or sick or…I don't know what to do." She said, tears dripping down her cheeks. The sun was setting and he felt a little chilled, he was glad she had worn the sweater for whatever reason. He released her, sitting down on the stair he had been standing on…the one where he'd found her it seemed so many years ago. He put his head in his hands and then looked up at her as she stood over him…his hands running soothingly up and down her jeaned legs.

"What are they going to do, baby?" He asked with such tenderness in his voice.

"Who Sam and Ric?" She asked sarcastically with a bit of fire in her voice.

"The doctors Alexis…what are they going to do?" She turned looking back out at the colors dancing over the water and then gave her attention back to her daughter's father.

He smiled encouragingly as he saw that tell-tale lip caught between her front teeth.

"Nothing." She waited a beat to make sure her intention sunk in. "There are talks of surgery, removing some of my lung…chemo. I'm not letting them do anything…I won't…" His hands still on her legs, he shook her to get her attention.

"Alexis, you have got to give up control…just this once. For the girls, for…for me…"

"NO." She shook her head and he felt her tears drop onto his pants legs as she shadowed him. "You've been so far away…why would you even care? Why are you being…"

"Why am I being the friend you remember?" She nodded and he pulled her down onto his lap. "I tried to push you away in every way possible while still keeping you in my life…it was wrong, but I didn't think I deserved you…but I can't lose you Alexis, not to this…not to death."

"I'm so scared." She admitted to him, her turn to press a kiss into his curls, so much like their daughter's. She hid her face in his neck. "What if I can't fight it and win…what if I end up shriveled and weak and nothing like myself…how is that good for my girls….my hair…"

She felt him moving his hands through the length of her hair, massaging her scalp with his hands…it was much longer now, longer than when he pulled it down from that tight clip the night their daughter was conceived. She had been fighting all her life, such a survivor and a much more ethical one than he would have ever dreamed of being. And then he heard her, his neck soaked with her tears…"I can't do it alone."

"You won't be alone. I promise you that, Alexis." He kissed her lips gently and she felt the hope there.

"Don't do that again, Sonny…don't promise things will be alright and that you're…you'll go away, they all do…my father, Stefan, Ned, Ric…" She said bringing her hand up to her lips as if to hold the seal kissed there and then she coughed and coughed…

He rocked her to him, gently back and forth. "I can promise, baby." He said, as in belief she began cry as the coughing eased. "So keep breathing…'cause I'm not leaving you anymore. You can believe it."

She quieted squeezing his fingers within hers, "Hold on to me, Sonny. Please don't let me go."

"Just keep breathing…I'm not leaving you anymore, not ever again."


End file.
